Linds Across the USA: September 2011

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Jam and Jelly, Jam and Jelly

Fun story for today. I went to the grocery store this afternoon, which I happen to love. For some reason, I find grocery shopping very enjoyable. Maybe it's because I like to walk up and down every single aisle, even if I'm only there for milk. Or maybe it's because I like to touch things. Or maybe it's because I'm hoping that Curtis Stone is still secretly filming "Take Home Chef" and that I will be his target in the produce section. Who knows?

Anyway, I was nice and excited for a little trip to the store today. But can I have a nice trip without incident? Of course not. Have you met me? That would be way too dull for my life.

Pretty much within the first 5 minutes I was in the store, a really fabulous/crazy man found me and decided it would be fun to shop with me, I guess? Ugh. He started trying to talk to me, and asked me if I wanted him to push my cart for me, yada yada yada. I said no and kept trying to walk away. Does it deter him? Nope. He proceeded to follow me around the entire time I was shopping. Everywhere. And once he got those fairly practical questions out of the way up front, there was nothing else left for him to say the whole time, except, "Jam and jelly. Jam and jelly. Jam and jelly." Just that. Over and over and over....following me around.

Not only was that super annoying, BUT I'm convinced he was making some reference to my body...possibly calling me fat. Beyonce style...as in, "I don't think you're ready for this jelly." Is that what it was about, sir?! Was it?! He's lucky I didn't leave there with only diet soda and celery.

(On a more positive note, I got some pictures from my birthday dinner last night! I mostly want to share them to showcase the GIANT piece of cake that I got. Look at that thing! It weighed approximately 4 pounds, and I'm not even lying. Good thing I had good friends to share it with!)

Monday, September 19, 2011

29 and Feelin' Fine...

Too bad "foxy" doesn't rhyme with 29...that would be more fitting. Yes, that's the one...I feel foxy at 29. It feels goooooooood.

I had anticipated freaking out a little bit today. Ooh scary...29. Just one more year until I'm...GASP...30! How horrifying, right?

Nope. Not the case at all. I feel great! And I'm super excited, and incredibly grateful, to be starting another year of this wild ride I call my life.

One thing I've learned in the last couple of years, and really in the last year, is that that thing, or really those two things, the "older" people keep telling us young guns are really, very true. #1 - getting older is actually pretty cool, and #2 - time just keeps going faster the older you get. And those two things together should encourage us all to take advantage of today...the moment we're currently living in. Not worrying about something nagging at us from the past (what's done is done), but also not worrying TOO much about the future (planning responsibly is good, but not at the cost of enjoying today). And I have so many reasons to be loving and adoring today...

1. I have an amazing family who supports me through every, single thing I decide to do (no matter how crazy sounding)
2. I have amazing friends who support me through every, single thing I decide to do (no matter how crazy sounding)
3. I have an incredible job that challenges me, excites me, inspires me, and makes me really want to continue building my career there for the long haul
4. I have my health
5. I just spent a ridiculously great year living in California, just because I wanted to...and had the added bonus of finding peace in the process
6. I just moved to a fabulous city that I am borderline obsessed with, and that makes me immediately feel at home and as if I'm right where I'm supposed to be
7. I have what I think is a pretty great sense of humor...which includes the strong ability to laugh at myself and not take things too seriously
8. I have a scarily limitless amount of energy...I'm not quite sure how I do it or where it comes from, but I seriously have more energy than any one person should have
9. I have the ability to continue to live my life exactly the way I want to, which is important because I have so many things I want to do and so many places I want to go and see
10. I must be doing SOMETHING right to have received the amount of birthday love that I did today - 71 Facebook notes/messages, 24 emails, 12 text messages, 5 Blackberry messenger notes, and 11 phone calls. Wowzas.

So cheers to another year of fun, laughter, craziness, love, adventures, challenge, travel, appreciation, growth (hopefully not physically), inspiration, and just plain amazingness. Not sure I've ever felt more wonderful than I do right now, and that, my friends, is an awesome place to be. Happy Birthday to me!

P.S. Thanks Mama for birthing me...that can't have been easy. I'm not sure if I'll ever want to experience that myself, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate it. Greatly. You're a saint. I love you.

Monday, September 12, 2011

We Have Arrived - Day Four

I realize this is a bit delayed, but as you can imagine, things reached the peak of craziness immediately upon our arrival in Chicago on Friday around noon. But I did still want to provide a recap of that last day of our journey.

Luckily, we powered through most of the journey on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday....so we only left about 200 miles to drive on Friday morning. Which was very helpful, considering we had to be to my apartment by 12:30pm at the very latest (since that was when my mover guys were scheduled to arrive and get started). It was raining most of the way (this will come back up shortly...), which made for pretty cloud-covered skies. Chicago was dry, thank goodness, but still kind of overcast. Here was my first view of the Windy City as I was approaching it to become a real, legit resident:

I got the same feeling then as I did when I saw the New York City skyline upon move-in approach back in January 2005...it just felt right. And good. And overwhelmingly exciting. Which was a relief to yours truly! I was pretty sure I'd feel that way, but it's always good to actually make it to that point and be right.

The moving guys were right on time, and did an awesome job. Unfortunately, my lemon of a moving truck had yet another problem, in that the back part leaked some during the hard rains...meaning some of my boxes were wet. Very uncool:

And this was the floor of the inside of the back of the truck:

I would have thought I would have freaked out way more, but whatever. It was done. There was no use giving myself an ulcer about it. Nothing was truly ruined, and I'm pretty sure Budget will be giving me a huge refund anyway...so it's okay in the end. But it's just more proof that I am, in fact, the "s**t magnet" as my parents call me. Ay-yi-yi.

And then, believe it or not, after we got everything moved into the apartment and were finally ready to go turn in that stupid Budget truck (which had been double-parked and blocking traffic for over 2 hours at this point), I turned the key to start it one last time...annnnnnnnd the battery was dead. No joke. Really?! How did all this happen?!

So I had to call Roadside Assistance AGAIN, and wait for this awesome tow truck to show up:

And for this abnormally large man to give the truck a jump (which luckily worked so we didn't have to get towed away):

Gotta love it. Right up until the very end. I really just need to accept it as fact...my life is never boring or dull, and it's just not meant to be that way!

Honestly, there was only one key stat from day four, which is:

Number of people who successfully and safely arrived to Chicago - 2

My mama and I did it! It was a crazy trip, but we made it. And I got all moved into my new, fabulous home. And another piece of good news? I love my apartment even more now than when I found it a couple weeks ago. It's perfection.

So that's it. I'm a Chicago resident. And I REALLY hope I want to stay for quite awhile. Moving is just such a pain, and stress, and cause of blood pressure sky-rocketing. Anyone that's thinking of moving should really consider the madness that is involved. It's pretty much a blur. And most people aren't lucky enough to have the best helper in the whole world along for the ride to pack, ride, move-in, and support - I don't think I could have done it without mama bear. Just like I have for every day of my life, I owe her big time!

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Politically Incorrect Adult Novelties - Day Three

Compared to days one and two of this journey, I have to say that day three was probably the least eventful. And that is totally fine by me. The less eventful days on a cross-country roadtrip are, the better.

We started off on the wrong foot though this morning - it was NOT our fault, however. All we needed to do was jet back onto I-40 East. All these guys needed to do was plan ahead for turning this beast off the off-ramp from I-40. They failed miserably...and then, as a result, so did we:

You know those giant wind fan thingys that you often see on the sides of highways? In the picture above is just one of those blades, on a flat bed truck. They are way bigger than I would have ever imagined...and I guess bigger than the driver imagined too. He literally got stuck trying to make this turn, and ended up blocking the entrance to I-40 for more than 25 cars (including the good ole Budget truck)....for over 45 minutes. Really?! You couldn't have anticipated that issue, sir? It's a giant blade and truck, and a super tight turn. Simple math, I would have thought. Gggrrrrrrrrrr.

That was the most annoying occurrence of the day, by far. What was the most fun one, you ask? It was definitely one of our gas station bathroom stops. We found probably the funniest vending machine I've ever seen....shown here:

"Assorted Adult Surprises!" How creepy does that sound? But that's not even the best part. They are all "politically incorrect".....and if you can make out the print, you will see that it includes the "New Bin Laden Condom." ......huh?! What the hell is a Bin Laden condom?! My mom and I cracked up about this machine, and that item in particular, forever after that. We were SO tempted to put in 75 cents so we could find out what that was....but then we figured that would immediately put us into a different class of people. (And don't go thinking I was the one who found this machine...my mama is the one who found it and showed me! She's so freaking cool.)

Key stats from day three of the journey:

* Number of miles traveled - 640.1

* Total miles now traveled on overall trip - 1990.8

* Miles left for tomorrow morning - approximately 200

* Number of stops at Taco Bell Express - only 1 (thank goodness, because I wanted to stop at least 4 times today...I have no idea why)

* Number of times I got too agressive topping off the gas tank and ended up spilling gasoline all over my left foot, ankle, and shoe - once (d'oh)

* Number of times semis flashed their headlights at me while driving tonight - 3 (Um yeah...those tail lights that broke yesterday and caused all that trouble, and then got fixed by Steve the mobile mechanic, to the tune of $100 for Budget, and an hour and a half of our travel time? Yeah, they went out again tonight....no joke.)

* Number of jerk semis who played 'chicken' with me tonight - 2 (seriously, I despise those two guys...I kept thinking about flipping them off or trying to moon them...but then remembered that they could easily run me off the road...not worth it)

* Number of iced coffees consumed post-10:00pm that are keeping me awake at 1:00am to even be able to type this - 1 (big mistake...)

Well, tomorrow is the big day. We should be pulling into the Windy City right around 12:00pm, and the movers will be immediately moving all my stuff in, and that will be that. So close now! Just one more short leg of the trip. We can do it...we can do it...

Run in With the Po-Po - Day Two

Let's see...how to sum up day two of the journey...well, for starters, America can be so great and interesting...but I forgot how it can also be painfully boooooooooring. Today's scenery was a lot of this:

And this:

Annnnnnnnnnnnd this:

YAWN. Seriously?! How is there that much open land? With nothing for miles and miles and miles. I said the same thing last year while headed in the opposite direction, but somehow it surprised me again this year. Please get me to a busy city....ASAP.

I wore my "I <3 Justin Bieber" bracelet for luck today (that was for you, LK!). Unfortunately, it didn't work so great. See below for details on our run-in with the law.

Eventually it got a LITTLE more pleasant on the eyes, and we started to see things like this again:

(At that point we would have taken anything we could get)

And luckily, we were able to confirm once and for all that New Mexico comes after Arizona when heading east across the USA:

Overall, it was a pretty good day though! We covered a lot of ground, stayed reasonably sane, and made it all the way into Oklahoma before ending the day. Now, let's get to the good stuff.

Key stats for day two of the journey:

* Number of miles driven today - 855.4

* Number of miles left in journey - approximately 800

* Things consumed in excess quantities today - cups of coffee and Atomic Fireballs

* Time we departed to start the day - 9:25am Arizona time

* Time we finally checked in to our hotel to call it a day - 2:30am CST

* Number of hotels we had to stop at in El Reno, OK before finding one that had vacancy at 2:30am - THREE

* Number of rooms available at ours when we got there - literally one! (and it was a smoking room...awesome)

* Number of apologies I owe my sweet mom for being such a crabby-pants to her from about midnight to 2:30am - 100 (not even sure that will cover it)

* Number of times we heard Enrique Iglesias' "Tonight I'm 'Loving' You" on the radio - 4 (which is weird because it's not even a new song...explaining the radio edit to my mom was super fun though)

* Number of times the Budget truck got pulled over by the cops on I-40 East - one (thanks Texas State Trooper Miller)

* Reason for police intervention in the journey - he noticed that both taillights had mysteriously gone out, and we were driving in the dark of night in middle of nowhere Texas

After Officer Miller let us go, I pulled off at the next I-40 exit, and into a parking lot to call Roadside Assistance - here we are:

They got a hold of a local mechanic and sent him our way. It took about 35 minutes from the time we pulled in until Steve-the-mechanic arrived to save us. Needless to say, at 9:30pm we were NOT happy campers about this precious-driving-time-wasting issue. Look how mad my mom was...that middle finger almost never comes out...

I wasn't too happy either...

He eventually got us fixed up....turns out there was a 10-amp plug thingy where there should have been a 15-amp plug thingy, and it just couldn't sustain the amount of lights the truck was using. So it crapped out. Boo.

Steve left us in that Home Dept parking lot (in Amarillo, TX) at 10:05pm, which left us to decide if we wanted to just bail for the day and stay there (but we had only covered 615 miles), or carry on into the night and hope we'd run into someplace to stay at the right time. We decided to truck on. We topped off the gas tank, got some coffee, and hit the road again. And as you saw above, we ended up driving another 240 miles, in about 4 hours, and then giving up at about 2:30am. What a day. And now? Time to start it over again....yippee! Here's to no police run-ins today.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Mission Haul-It-Back-East - Day One

Whew. Day one of the moving journey is complete! And it was about as successful as I could have hoped for - (almost) everything went off without a hitch.

First, we made my fabulous Santa Monica apartment look like this:

It was so strange to see it all bare and empty, just like when I toured it and fell in love with it a little over a year ago. Did maybe one little tear well up in my eye when I saw that? Um...no comment.

At least my awesome built-in desk was finally empty so that I could do my model pose on it, like I've been wanting to do all year...but it's always way too full of crap.

We loaded up all of my earthly possessions into this guy:

(Okay, that's a lie. I paid 2 dudes to put all my stuff in this truck. Hired labor is where...it's...at. I don't lift boxes and furniture. I could. But I choose not to. Period.)

And once everything was finally loaded up in the truck, I could relax...a little bit anyway. Just long enough to shoot this new ad for Budget truck rentals:

Then it was time to turn in my keys and hit the road! Starting on the west coast meant that a lot of today looked like this:

Annnnnnnnd this:

What? Who drives a 16' rental truck like it ain't no thang? This girl. It's just like riding a bike! Or maybe it's just that I move too much, and driving moving trucks is becoming too much of a habit?

Key stats from day one of the journey:

* Miles driven - 494.7

* Miles left in journey - approximately 1655

* City my Amex card first got flagged in for identity verification - Flagstaff, AZ (flagged in Flagstaff??)

* Number of radio stations we picked up in middle-of-nowhere Arizona - ONE (and it was only broadcasting a baseball game...of two teams we've never heard of)

* Number of curbs taken out while I was driving - ZERO! (if you'll remember, that's way better than day one of last year's moving journey)

* Number of trees that I scraped the truck roof on - 3 (darn it)

* Money spent on gas - about $215 (oh, how I wish I was exaggerating that number)

* Number of moths that randomly flew out from under the truck seats while I was driving - one (scared the crud out of me...I almost ran off the road I freaked out so bad...not good)

* Number of other drivers I cussed at for cutting me off - I lost count somewhere around 18

* Favorite moment of day one? This conversation:

Me - "Wait, wait...what state are we in right now?"

Mom - "I'm not entirely sure."

Me - "New Mexico?"

Mom - "Maybe. Or maybe Arizona?"

Me - "Which comes first from the west? New Mexico or Arizona?"

Mom - "Arizona, I think. But I'm really not sure."

Me - "Me either. I guess we don't really NEED to know what state we're in right now, right?"

Maybe tomorrow Mama and I can spend some portion of our 10-11 hours in the truck practicing our geography skills? Oy vey.

Bye-Bye Santa Monica

My very last day in Santa Monica can be summed up in a few photos...

No joke, I ordered boxes online to pack up all my stuff. Which means that my boxes were delivered to me in other boxes, via Amazon.com. Here they were waiting for me outside my door the other night:

Then, with the help of my amazing mama (it would NOT have happened without her!), they became these beautifully packed, ready to move boxes:

And then we decided to have a little fun with our last 1/2 day in Southern California before hitting the road. We took a walk on the beach - I will seriously miss all the cheesy beach references everywhere!

Then a little photo shoot with my very favorite Santa Monica sign:

Had to have a ham moment in the street right in front of my building, one last time:

And then we absolutely had to take the drive up the Pacific Coast Highway to Malibu, so we could stop and have champagne at Spruzzo. It's a little restaurant right across from Zuma Beach in Malibu (amazing views) that my "Honey Bun" and I found about a year ago when he and I did that same drive. It'll always be our special spot (love you, DL), but I love to take other people there now too...and of course had to take my mama!

Aside from all the madness of 2 days of packing up all my belongings, my mom and I managed to have quite a good time in LA! I couldn't be any happier that she came out to hang out with me, and help me pack, and be my emotional support...she's incredible. I definitely owe her one. Or a hundred.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Adios to You, LaLa Land

Dear Santa Monica,

What a wild ride it's been with you. I've lived here for a whole year now, and I couldn't be any happier that I made the decision to do that. I've had the most amazing year, and I did everything I meant to do here, and I got everything out of this experience that I was hoping for...and then a whole bunch more too.

It's hard to sum up how I'm feeling right now, on this, my last night in Los Angeles (as a resident anyway...I'll for sure be back for visits!). So I'll just go ahead and do my favorite thing...make a list! Here are some of my fondest memories and favorite things about my year in Southern California:

1. Hollywood Bowl (exactly how many bottles of wine can 3 people sneak in on their persons?!)
2. LA Philharmonic (we so fancy)
3. Cabo Cantina (sooooooo many great times here...I wouldn't even know where to begin)
4. Trips to Victoria's Secret (especially after bottomless drinks at Cabo Cantina, when we don't always remember going, or buying huge bags of lingerie...and yes, this happened more than once)
5. Walks on and by the beach (daytime, night-time, any time)
6. Celebrity sightings at LAX
7. Celebrity sightings in my neighborhood
8. Disneyland with LK (nothing better than drinking a few dirty martinis at Downtown Disney, and then running around the park tipsy with our sequin Minnie Mouse ears on....and also not being able to find the "plus" button on the keychain maker machine...)
9. TV shopping in the rain with LM (and seeing Seth Rogen and James Franco while in line)
10. Riding a tandem bike down to Marina del Rey to find the 'Banana Stand'
11. El Cholo dates (and ogling the yummy looking host)
12. Stepping in tar on a beach walk with MS (and then spending the next 2 hours drinking margaritas and trying everything we could think of to get it off...nail polish remover was finally the victor)
13. "Golf Pros and Tennis Hos" bar crawl
14. St. Patrick's Day bar crawl
15. Okay....every single bar crawl we went on in the last year...bar crawls are the best
16. Bowling (and the photos shoots that follow)
17. Monsoon happy hours (again, so many that I can't even begin to count)
18. Rose Bowl (and dressing LK up as a Badger fan)
19. Volunteering at the LA Food Bank
20. Going on special adventures in Venice (and always feeling a little dazed afterward)
21. The Hustler Store in West Hollywood (um...let's not delve any further into this one)
22. Almost freezing to death in Anaheim at the Angels game (thank goodness it was free beanie night...I'm pretty sure those things saved our lives)
23. Flinging my precious "independence ring" off my hand and into the dark sand on the beach at 2:30am one night...and then spending the next 30 minutes searching for it by the light of Blackberrys (KB ended up finding it for me...he's still my hero for that)
24. Hiking in all the awesome mountains in and around LA (it's the best workout that doesn't actually feel like a workout in the world!)
25. The W-E-A-T-H-E-R (what more is there to say?)

Those are just 25 of the countless amazing things from my LA life in the past year (it took me a short 2 minutes to come up with that list...it's so easy), but I have to stop there, because if I don't, I'll just rattle on until I get to #3623 and realize it's 4:00am and I have to get up in 1 hour to start my moving day. That wouldn't be a pretty sight. Plus going too far would probably make me a little emotional. And there's no time for that right now!

So that's it. This show is just about over. I start the journey to move to Chicago tomorrow! My mom is here with me, and has been for 3 days now. Yes...I've done ALL my packing in the last 3 days. (Mom, you are the best!)

Apartment is totally disassembled, cleaned up, 30 boxes are packed up and ready to go, 16' foot moving truck gets picked up in about 8 hours, with 2,150 miles in front of us, and a partridge in a pear tree. I'm ready. Let's get this show on the road!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Lease = SIGNED!!

This is about a week late, but still amazingly fabulous....my lease in Chicago is signed and finalized! It's a real deal now. No turning back. Wowzas.

I was lucky enough to find a really awesome apartment for myself...after looking at about 20 places total (no joke). My poor realtor was probably ready to kill me by the end. But what can I say? I know what I like and what I want.

The apartment is in the EXACT location I was hoping for - which is a huge feat. I was starting to get a little discouraged by the end, thinking that I would either have to take a less-great apartment in the right location, or a great apartment in an area that's not exactly what I want (but still would have been good). But eureka! The second to last place was "the one" - hooray!

So what is this place like, you ask? Let me tell you. It's a 1/2 block off of Lake Michigan, right by Oak Street Beach. It's a 23-story building (great sun deck on the top!), and I will be on the 14th floor. The apartment faces south (perfect), with great views of the skyline, including the John Hancock Building. I will also have west and east views (hello, Lake Michigan right there!) from my very spacious BALCONY...oh yeah, my own balcony. The apartment is almost 900 square feet...which means I'm going to need some more furniture to really fill it up. There are probably worse spots to be in, right?

It's incredible. It just FEELS like a place I should be. It's right in the middle of all the hustle and bustle of the city, but still a tree-lined street. I just couldn't be any happier about it...I can't wait to move in there and make it my own.

If you don't believe I'm happy, check out this picture (thanks KH for taking it, and for coming with me!) of me signing my lease:

And then shortly after that, here I am hamming it up in front of my new building:

Siiiiiiiggggghh of relief. I have a new home to move into, and a place to put all my stuff. Next hurdle? Actually packing all that stuff up and getting it there, 2100 miles away. I leave in less than 5 days, and have yet to start packing. But I'm not worried. I've got a plan, like always. And that plan flies into LA tomorrow afternoon...stay tuned!